Friday, August 15, 2014

In-Laws 101

So your in laws don't like you. First you're thinking, no I will do whatever I can to win them over. Then you think well I'm not marrying them, I am marrying him/her and we don't have to involve them. AND last but not least fuck it I don't care, he/she loves me thats all that matters.


This guide is really form to reread and remember when I can't stand them, to breath in, breath out, and move the hell on.
So your mom in law is a monster in law, oh well. Your father in law is a flake in law, you will be ok.

My solution?

Find whatever it is you need t be into and don't give a shit. Slowly but surely they will come around and if they don't you wouldn't have wasted time dating them, or plotting their demise. You would have, I don't know, lived your life perhaps? Picture that.

What is my thing? Drinking.
Don't get me wrong... I in no way am promoting alcoholism or being an alcoholic. I'm just saying having a shot of whiskey before i have to speak to them helps me not say a damn thing, because:

A: I have to much class to let them know I have been drinking.
B: I might say some shit I can't take back.
C: In the words of Kendrick Lamar, all I am thinking is  " B**** don't kill my vibe"

Its always easier to not get blamed for anything when they can't remember what you said or did, cause you didn't say or do anything. You go ahead and marinate on that thought right there. That's right. Let it sink in... real deeeeeep...... quietly while you're at it...

And that right there is lesson one.